It's the last week of 2020, so I asked myself which practice this year has created the greatest internal shift, propelled me forward, and resulted in much personal growth. With no hesitation, I would say that the concept of unconditional love has been foundational and transformational for myself and in coaching my clients.
My primary focus was on cultivating this type of love for myself. Let's not confuse this with having an ego or being arrogant. It is quite the opposite.
The ego and arrogance are born in insecurity. They are a blanket of protection we use to cover up our fragile sense of self.
On the other hand, unconditional love is like being naked, in touch with all your virtues and flaws. You fully accept yourself. There is no pretense. There is no need for the ego to protect you.
When we love ourselves unconditionally, we see ourselves as whole, perfect in all our imperfections. It is like traveling to the epicenter of our Being. From here, we see everything so clearly. We see ourselves as the Human Being that we are meant to be. Raw. Pure; Love lives there.
We may find it very easy to feel unconditional love when we meditate, things go as planned, and our expectations are met. However, in the moments of pain, when we don't have what we want, or we act in ways we are not proud of, loving ourselves may be challenging. But this, my friends, is our test, our opportunity to practice unconditional love.
This type of love has no conditions, no requirements. We get to experience it, even when we are performing at our worst. We see ourselves in our humanity, and we have a full appreciation for the parts of us that are wonderful and the parts of us that are not.
One of the greatest obstacles that keep us from unconditionally loving ourselves is the perception that we need to hate, deny, repress, or judge the part of us we don't like. As a result, we beat ourselves up or disconnect from ourselves and live in unconsciousness.
We may have good intentions. We want to grow and become the better versions of ourselves, but hating ourselves in our current state will not get us anywhere. We may think that once we have become that version, we will finally get to love ourselves. But when we hate ourselves along the way, I promise you that we will not arrive at the finish line, and we won't get to be that person.
Unconditional love is the fuel we need to get there. Loving ourselves throughout our life journey is the only way to becoming the person we want to be. This is only possible because we love ourselves today, exactly the way we are.
Your better future self does not look down on your present self. She loves all of you as you are now. Your future self understands and knows that you are still perfectly human, even when you have crossed the finish line. You will still experience life as 50/50. You'll just be dealt a whole new set of cards through which you can continue to practice unconditional love for yourself. This cycle, my friends, will only end with our last breath.
I can't tell you how liberating it is to know and feel this truth in every single one of your bones. I genuinely believe that our purpose on this Earth is to be Humans and embrace our humanness. We can only do this through unconditional love for ourselves. Rejection and denial will only create a painful experience in our life journey.
With this being said, let's take a look at 2020 and how each of us experienced it. Let's open up our consciousness to all the parts of ourselves that did not shine this year. Let's remember the moments of sadness, frustration, anger. Let's pay attention to all our actions that turned out to have unwanted results. Now open up your hearts and love it all. I encourage you to travel to the epicenter of your Being to cultivate that love.
Love the heck out of yourself because it is the good and the bad in you that makes you whole and perfect. Practice this in your darkest moments so you may see the light. The unconditional love for yourself will guide you throughout your earthly journey and help you conquer your life's dreams.
Loving yourself is your most significant contribution to the world. When you harvest this love within you, you can practice unconditional love for others. And yes, I know it is not easy. I'm still practicing this myself. I know each of you has at least one person you find very hard to love in your life.
Please know that we can do hard things. What does that look like for me? I start with feeling compassion for that person. It does take work, but I much rather feel compassion than contention because I'm the one who gets to feel and experience the emotion. So if anything, do it for yourself because whatever emotion you feel, that emotion lives in your heart and Being, not the other person's heart.
Yes, we can do hard things. We can love ourselves unconditionally; we can accept and feel compassion for others on our way to feeling love, even when it seems impossible.
We can do the impossible. Love is a worthy cause, my friends. I wish you all to fill your hearts with it as we close this year. It is the gift you can give to yourselves that will multiply in exponential ways. You will feel fully alive, as you are meant to feel.
It will be an honor for me to accompany you in your journey to loving yourself unconditionally. I have powerful tools and concepts that, when applied and practiced, can create profound transformation. I've experienced it myself and my clients. I invite you to schedule a free mini-session to explore what is keeping you from loving yourself.
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